“People keep saying that 2016 was the worst. That may be true in some cases, but the world of film told a different story. This was the year of quiet triumphs and breathtaking beauty; of gruesome fun and shocking twists. 2016 was so packed with great films that I couldn’t possibly keep up and way too many slipped past me. These include: Moonlight, Manchester by the Sea, Jackie, American Honey, Don’t Think Twice, Loving, The Handmaiden, Silence… it hurts to see what I missed side-by-side. ” – TheJaminBean, The bH Scale “Top 10 Movies of 2016”
Truer words were never spoken. However, we cannot simply gloss over the fact that 2016 also carried some stinkers in the film world. From short clips on Vine/Instagram/Twitter/Facebook, to Netflix and chillin’ with your significant other (or someone else’s… who am I to judge?), to sitting in a theatre trying to ignore the teenagers loudly making out in the back row (seriously, it sounded like actual slurping), there were just some flicks and clips that… failed to impress.
That’s what this list is for. Presenting (in no particular order) – the 5 Worst Movies/Clips/Shows of 2016:
- TV Show: Kevin Can Wait, Episode: “Who’s Better Than Us?”Our first problem here is that Kevin Can Wait is not a good show. Do not get me wrong – Kevin James is funny and King of Queens was a great show until it ended in 2007. However in Kevin Can Wait, Kevin James doesn’t live up to his billing. The show producers clearly know this… so they tried to up the ante by bringing in some “star power” in Episode 8, Who’s Better Than Us? The problem is, that “star power” came in the form of Adam Sandler. Sandler’s guest appearance in Kevin Can Wait is so bad, the laugh track feels more forced than normal. Instead of the booster shot that Kevin James needed, Sandler’s spot serves more of a “used heroine needle” role – it’s dirty, it may give you an STD, and you probably dragged it in off the street. While you want to avoid Kevin Can Wait anyway, make sure you never, ever watch this episode. It may ruin television for you forever.
- TV Show: Conan, Episode: “Cast of Suicide Squad”Conan is a carrot-topped, 6’4” genius of late-night television. However, all that glitters on Conan’s brightly-lit set is not gold. Sometimes it’s pure, reeking excrement seeps into all facets of an otherwise fun time to utterly ruin everyone’s day. This particular pure, reeking excrement came in the form of Adam Sandler, appearing in a sketch depicting a Young Han Solo audition. Whether laughing at his own jokes (when no one else laughed) or playing buddy-buddy with those who must secretly hate him (looking at you, everyone who actually watched Ridiculous 6), Sandler’s appearance was the worst I’ve seen on Conan until…
- TV Show: Conan, Episode: “Stars of Here Comes the Funny Tour, with Clipping”This episode, Sandler re-appeared on an otherwise great night that had guests David Spade, Nick Swardson, Norm Macdonald, and Rob Schneider, and experimental hip hop artist Clipping. All in all, it had the makings of an excellent episode before Sandler appeared. Don’t get me wrong – Spade/Swardson/Macdonald/Schneider have all had their stinkers too. But at least they own up to it. Sandler manages to infect everything good in the world with cheap, tired jokes about butts and farts, then try to save it by forcing a ‘moral’ that he pulled out of a fortune cookie. Conan… I expected better of you.
- Media: Instagram, Profile: @AdamSandlerAdam Sandler ruined Instagram for me. Not only can he not figure out how to use it properly (32 posts in the last 2.5 years. THIRTY. TWO.) but he manages to take self-gratification to a whole new level (and this is INSTAGRAM, people) when he does post. One of his most popular posts this year was when he put up a picture of him hooked to an IV, after canceling a show. 90,000 people liked the fact that he had canceled a show, which should tell you something about how the world feels about Sandler.By the way, he’s posted a video on Instagram, so that’s why his profile appears in this “Movies/Clips/Shows” article. If you don’t like it, sue me.
- Movie: The Do-Over
By now, you get it. Adam Sandler was the worst thing about film and media in 2016, blah blah blah. The Do-Over is just BAD… and everyone who has seen it wishes they could get a Do-Over on the choice that led them to watch it.
TL;DR – Sandler’s the worst, here’s why:
- Kevin Can Wait – “Who’s Better Than Us?” (guest: Adam Sandler)
- Conan – “Cast of Suicide Squad” (guest: Adam Sandler)
- Conan – “Stars of Here Comes the Funny Tour” (guest: Adam Sandler)
- @AdamSandler on Instagram (starring: Adam Sandler)
- The Do-Over (written, produced, and starring: Adam Sandler)
If you’re Adam Sandler… have a sense of humor, please don’t sue me.